My name is Michelle. I’m a college undergraduate Dietetics student on the east coast. Throughout college I’ve struggled with depression, sometimes mild, and sometimes severe. Sophomore year was completely consumed by depression and manic behavior. My depression surfaced in the form of binge eating my sophomore year and it lasted for almost a year. Originally this blog was about overcoming binge eating and major depression (see Where the Blog Started). I’ve been binge-free for over six months now and have a much better handle on my depression. So the purpose of the blog has shifted a bit.
I’m still actively trying to look at life in a positive way. Although my depression is much more mild than last year, it’s still easy to fall into a pattern of pessimistic thinking and dwelling on sad emotions. The blog follows me as I try to find happiness in everyday life, even when life throws curve balls.
Although I’m not suffering from the binge-restrict cycle anymore, I still struggle with some body image issues and occasional food-related problems. It’s no longer about preventing a binge, or celebrating a binge-free night. Now it’s about eating as balanced and healthy as possible without obsessing, restricting, or overthinking it. It’s about trusting your gut, literally. Listening to cravings, listening to hunger (making sure it’s physical hunger, not emotional), stopping when satisfied, etc.
It’s also a tribute to my dad who lost his battle with cancer on January 12th, 2010. He knew about my depression and always tried to get me to see the positive in life. It was also really painful for him to see me deal with food issues because he didn’t understand it, and couldn’t help me with it. I want to live life the way that he always wanted me to. I want to actively seek happiness when I’m feeling down, because when I was happy my dad was happy. I want to fully overcome any lasting food issues for myself and my dad. I also want to dedicate myself to a healthy, balanced, adequate diet because I know that the better you eat the healthier you are, and I want to do everything I can to live the healthiest life imaginable after seeing what my dad went through.
To sum it up, the blog is about eating well, thinking clearly, loving often, and feeling happy. 🙂